Week 7: Why are my taxes such an annoyance?

Lovely, it’s tax time here in the US.  Everyone should be receiving their W-2 tax forms and it’s time to file for a refund.  Or if you’re really unlucky, it’s time to pay.  I had to pay one year after I had actually had a fairly decent year for book sales.  That would be because no one seems to take any taxes out of book royalties and so you have to tell the government how much you made at the end of the year and then pay tax on the amount you made.  Fantastic.

Now years ago what I had to do was to go down to the library or somewhere else that had them, and get whatever tax form I needed.  Then I would fill my form out by hand and mail it in to the IRS.  That’s the Internal Revenue Service for anyone who didn’t know.  I don’t mind the IRS as they’ve actually helped me once.

Years ago I was fired from a job after working there for a couple years.  It was a bad place and getting fired was probably one of the better things that could have happened to me.  Anyway, when it came time to file my taxes that year the company didn’t bother to send me a W-2 form for me to file with.  I called the company and they told me they didn’t care if I received my form or not.  So I called the IRS and told them the company refused to mail me a W-2.  The nice IRS guy had me estimate how much I had made that year and then they sent me a W-2 with that estimate on it that I could file with.  Someone also obviously went down to the company and had a little chat with them because within a few days I did then receive the actual W-2 from the company.  So I was quite happy to be helped out.

That was back when I was still getting the form and doing things by hand before mailing it in to the IRS.  Things are different now.  We now live in the age of electronics!  I can just file my taxes online!  That makes everything quick and easy, right?  Right?  WRONGO!

All of a sudden my email is full of these tax companies wanting me to do my taxes with their program online.  Of course they charge to use the program.  The forms at the library were always free and I’m sure they still are, but I don’t want to do everything by hand.  That takes time and I have to do the math myself.  This is the age of electronics, so my computer should be doing this stuff for me!

I looked in to a few of the tax programs and they all want to charge you for every little thing now.  I don’t feel I should have to pay for every little thing, though!  I need help from the IRS!  So I go to IRS.com.  And there’s a program that will allow me to do my taxes for free!  Halleluiah! I get to work on that.  All I need to do is plug in the numbers from the forms I have and it will figure everything out for me.  Very cool!  I don’t need to worry about paying the IRS this year as I was only paid a total of $69 in royalties this year.  Yes, very sad, but I’m not disappointed.  That’s still $69 more than I would have made if I hadn’t bothered writing the books.  And these are old books that have been out for a while, too. 

So I get my taxes all figured out and the IRS owes me a fair amount!  Very good, I get a tax return!  Hooray!  Now I’m faced with two options, I can file online, or I can print the forms the program has filled out for me and mail them in.  I don’t want to mail anything.  Why use a stamp when I can just file electronically?  I’ll tell you why, because it costs $45 to file electronically!  What the hell?  It was supposed to be the free IRS software!  After pouting about this for a bit, I finally figure who cares about $45, just file electronically and then I’ll be sure my taxes don’t get lost in the mail somewhere.  And then there is another problem.

Now before it will let me file electronically I have to find some number.  The software sends me to this web site, but I still can’t figure out what number I’m looking for!  What the hell?  I have to log in, but can’t log in!  Now I need a password!  Now I need the 84 digit code that has 28 capitals and three random phrases from some movie I’ve never seen!  What the hell is all this?  I just want to file my taxes!

It took me a little bit of time and was quite a pain in the behind, but I finally figured out what number I needed.  After paying my $45 up front, I was then allowed to file electronically.  What a pain in the ass!  Why is something that’s supposed to be so simple so complicated now?

I still haven’t received my tax return yet.  I’m sure it’s “in the mail”.  I opted for direct deposit instead of just having them send me a check that I’m sure would have been needlessly complicated to cash anywhere now.

I’m not sure why this was such a pain especially when it should have been easier than just doing everything by hand.  I’m probably just bitter about the $45 electronic filing fee.  That seems like an awful lot just to send a file!

At least I’m finished with taxes until next year.  I really feel for my friends in the UK who I’ve heard are taxed way more than I am!  Ok, I’m done asking why for this week.  But please, everyone keep on asking why!